Hi there,
Ever felt like you really want to go to that event but also don’t want to get out of the couch? Or want to leave this job but oh it is so good here? How about stopping seeing that person you know is not for you and yet you want their company? Oh let’s not even get started on food — your mouth says pizza, your mind quinoa bowl.
All these contradictory things that different parts of us want, at the same time. How do we go from here?
Truth is, there’s no shortage of voices to listen to within ourselves.
We all have (at least) five main voices, that I here call:
instincts/your sex
emotional body
heart
mind
intuition
Put it simply, our instincts are there to make sure we survive and reproduce. It involves our ability to avoid risks, and to react to what threatens our survival, be it by running away or fighting. It also includes sexual attraction, which would guarantee our reproduction.
As for the second, our emotional body is about relating, bonding, our need for belonging (and fear of not belonging and being judged), and attachments. Our emotions are linked to our nervous system and hormones. Fears, frustrations, hoarding, and grudges are all part of the emotional body.
Next, is the heart. Many things people normally associate with the heart I actually would say are the emotional body. The element of the heart is air; the heart is all about spaciousness. It's a gate that allows things in and out — we cannot hold air. Eternal expansion and abundance live here. Mercy, acceptance, compassion. Unconditional love. Remember, a heart has wings; nothing hurts a heart more than being put in a cage. It can be difficult to grasp these traces of the heart when the emotional body is hijacking us.
Then there is the mind, being logical about it all — whatever its own definition of logic is. The mind likes things to be linear, graspable, predictable, and controllable; it wants to put all within a model. This is what in Tibetan is called “sem”, discourse thought, small mind. This mind has a thing for order; it tells us what we are expected to do, what we cannot do, and what we must absolutely do. You know the drill.
Finally, there is what I call here intuition, which would be a “higher” intelligence that has access to a greater picture. In Tibetan it's called rikpa, meaning intelligence or brightness. It releases us from certain mental limitations (‘but this is impossible!’) and shows us not-so-normal and nonlinear paths.
All these voices are in different frequencies, and that is why we listen to some of them better than others. For many, the heart and the intuition are whispers (or rather whale singing sounds that they cannot decipher) whereas the mind, the instincts, and the emotional body are always shouting. Listening to different frequencies is like changing radio stations. For people who are rigid in one specific bandwidth, this change of stations requires quite some training.
Alignment
Much of our daily dissatisfaction and angst comes from misalignment: we listen only to some of these voices, and the voices we listen to are at war. Even worse, we allow these voices to rule us.
We are all multi-conscious beings. Yes, we can discuss that some of these voices are social and mental constructs, and not the real you. We can embark on a deep process to clear ancestor wounds and heal mom and dad issues that live within these different bodies. We can quiet the mind, heal old emotional traumas, practice mindfulness, and not react over instincts.
Although we can remove the noise pollution for sure (meditation and presence, yey!), there will always be some communication between these sides of us, for each of these parts has a role to play in our existence. The work of inner alignment is the work of making all these voices sing together in a symphony and get back to their proper seat.
Who is the Master? How to Come into Alignment
If you want to come into alignment, first and foremost you need to recognize who is the master (or, at least, who you want it to be). I hope your answer to this question is… you.
Which brings us to the most important question of all: who are you? Are you your mind? Are you your instincts? Are you your emotions? Are you by any chance over-identifying yourself with one of these, or simply allowing them to run the show?
The more we practice presence and coming into a state of the observer, the more we realize we are none of these voices. Say you are your higher self, a soul in a physical body, which also contains a mental and an emotional body.
To get into alignment, you can recognize yourself for who you truly are, and understand that these different bodies of yours have their own mechanisms and are communicating with you. Would you allow a friend to shout at you or give you commands over your life? Then why are you allowing dear cousin emotions to run the show?
This doesn’t mean ignoring these voices. We listen to them, with presence and care. We also give them a shake and laugh a bit at them when they come with too much BS, because why not. We talk to them as dear friends who don’t want to create trauma — we are, after all, in these bodies 24/7, driving together. We want their best.
From this place of recognizing ourselves for something beyond all these voices, we can then be good diplomats and listen to all the voices. It’s a work of presence, of becoming a better listener, slowing down, and becoming more present. The only way to be a good listener is to know how to be silent and caring. This takes patience, time, and self-care. Work, right?
The point is to be able to listen and connect to all these voices, caring, but without over-attachment and identification. What makes this possible is, again, your ability to connect to yourself, to your real nature, to your essence. It all boils down to who are you? And, from that place of knowing thyself, you can embody that self, that real master, who discerns in each situation what needs to be catered.
It's a matter of disconnection.
Spiritually speaking, most misalignment happens because we don’t know who we truly are. If you don’t know who you are and thereby who the master is, you can make sure all the different parts will try to run the show, simply because they have to keep this engine running despite its driver's absense — none of the bodies want to go on a car crash. Still, they can hurt you in the process because, let's face it, they were not meant to be drivers. But what are their options when there is no driver?
It takes a strong driver to be always present and aware, and not sleep behind the wheel, and that is the point: to be that divine self that is always shining. That's self-mastery.
The more we know who we truly are, the more these voices sound like different parts of an integrated system, like a car with multiple lights in its panel so that the driver is informed and can make proper assessments and take action when and if needed.
Know thyself is the motto of many mystery schools because it's the key question for all unfolding. The practice of getting to know who you truly are is the ultimate practice, the reason why so many meditate night and day, become yogis, sadhaks, or simply keep living their lives to the fullest in utmost presence. It might unconsciously be the reason why you keep reading about spirituality, who knows. All in all, it's a long-term project of devotion to yourself.
Alignment in Practice
A great way to train alignment is to care enough to slow down and bring your attention to each of the voices.
Are you having an issue in life? A big question you have been struggling with, or have been avoiding completely, maybe? Great! Let’s use it to practice.
Here are a few steps:
Stop in silence, close your eyes, take some deep breaths. Ask one of the voices what it has to say about your problem. Once it has completed its point, thank it, open your eyes, and write down its main points if needed.
Then close your eyes again, take a few deep breaths, and do the same with another voice. Go on, until you’ve gone through all five voices: instinct, emotions, heart, mind, intuition.
Some voices will be sharp and clear, others will take time till they are able to make sense of and articulate themselves. Maybe the mind can throw a 300 pages book at you, whereas the instincts just say "I want this, it's shiny and will get me laid" and the intuition is like a cloud with the shape of a dog (or is it a cookie?).
This is a simple way to learn to listen to the wholeness of you, and not only this or that. It trains to change radio bandwidths so you can connect to all voices better, honor them, and be more conscious about what you are basing your decisions and life on. Most importantly, it brings integration and reclaiming parts of you that might have gone under the carpet.
This exercise might not lead you to any solution to your problem, and it's ok. First, we listen. This means we are giving ourselves space, attention, and understanding. This is pure love, and love is the greatest magician. Oftentimes, things settle on their own, if we create space for them (instead of trying to force things through).
Other points to bring into awareness are: are you allowing one voice to always overpower the others? Have you allowed it to become your master? Are you fine with that?
Sometimes, before simplifying, we need to increase the complexity to get a real picture of what is going on.
It's about being present enough to acknowledge and honor the different facets of your multi-conscious being. Yet, to not let them run the show — keep connected to who you truly are.
See you next week,
Aline
Ps: Would you like to work on your spiritual progression with me? Learn more about my work here.
I really enjoyed this article which provided me with something I've been searching years to accomplish; steps for getting to know myself. Your steps in focusing on the inner voices is a reveling practice and I somehow understood after years of meditation that it wasn't who I am in reaching my 'higher' self, but what I am in relation to the greater part of existence as one. Thank you.